Sunday, December 31, 2006

by Eileen Ogintz
Tribune Media Services

Forget about losing 10 pounds.

Don’t get me wrong: Of course we should exercise more and eat less. Don’t we all resolve to do exactly that this time of year? But instead of beating ourselves up over resolutions that go by the wayside a week into the new year, let’s talk about some resolutions we might actually keep in 2007. Let’s talk vacation resolutions—strategies guaranteed to bolster the fun quotient on your next trip with the kids and, just as important, lessen the stress. These really do work—most of the time, anyway. (If you have some family-travel resolutions of your own, send them to me at eileen@takingthekids.com and I’ll post this website.)

Of course, no matter how well you plan, things will go wrong when you’re traveling with kids. Moms will freak out when the flight is canceled. Dads will get lost and refuse to ask for directions. The kids will get mosquito bites so bad that your 2-year-old looks like she has chicken pox. It will rain nonstop in Hawaii. Yes, these have all happened to us, and then some.

But as I take down the tree and all the ornaments bought on past trips (the hula-dancing Santa from Hawaii, the moose from Yellowstone, the Eiffel Tower from Paris, the lighthouse from Maine, the skiers from all over the West), recollections of our misadventures make me smile just as much as the memories of picture-perfect vacation days. Still, there’s plenty of room for improvement, my kids tell me, and I vow to do things better in 2007.

1. I will ... plan on more lazy mornings and more hang-out time wherever we go. The kids always remind me that it’s not vacation if you’re constantly on the go. Besides, we have some of our best conversations when we’re “doing nothing,” and when else but on vacation do we even have time to talk to one another?

2. I will ... ask the kids where they want to go and what they want to do when we get there. I know they’ll lead us in directions we otherwise wouldn’t have taken. More important, they can help take the planning load off of my shoulders. If things don’t go as expected, they can’t blame mom! Hopefully they’ll be more accommodating with my picks, and I’ll make sure some of those are on the itinerary as well.

3. I will ... be more spontaneous. OK, so I’m not the same girl who hitchhiked to Scotland on the back of a rhubarb truck and slept in a field of sunflowers in Spain. But what’s wrong with stopping at an alligator farm we see advertised for miles along the highway, or skipping the cruise excursion to go exploring on our own? The kids are right when they say that unscripted trips are more adventurous (as long as you don’t get stuck without a place to sleep at midnight).

4. I will ... delegate the drudge jobs without feeling guilty. I don’t have to do laundry, cook dinner or do dishes every night on vacation. The kids can help. So can maid service and take-out restaurants. I’m sure that if I look, I can find a laundry that offers wash-and-fold service. So what if it costs a few extra bucks? It’s vacation after all.

5. I will ... let everyone go off in different directions—including me. We don’t have to be in lockstep every minute. That doesn’t work, especially when vacationing with extended family, and there’s nothing that will ruin a vacation faster than too much togetherness. Besides, if we separate to do something we really want to do—shop, golf, hit the spa or go to a museum—we’ll all be happier later when we gather for dinner. At least we’ll have plenty to talk about.

6. I will ... do something outrageous, whether singing karaoke, screaming on an upside-down roller coaster, or pampering myself with a hot-stone massage. I will try something new with my kids, letting them lead me for a change. That’s what vacations are for, after all. And since I’ll never see these strangers around me again, I don’t have to worry about looking like an idiot.

7. I will ... seek ways to make travel easier, even if it costs a little more to ship luggage ahead, book nonstop flights or rent a larger, roomier car. I’ve decided that lowering the travel stress quotient is worth the extra freight. And we all know that if mom is less stressed when we travel, so is everyone else on the trip.

8. I will ... allow extra time wherever I’m going, remain calm when travel plans go awry, and not embarrass my children by arguing with airline ticket agents when the check-in line is so long that we’re certain to miss our flight, with security personnel when we’re pulled out of the security line for “secondary screening,” or with hotel desk clerks when our reservations have gotten lost.

9. I will ... travel light and make sure the kids do, too. Not only don’t I want to pay extra for overweight bags, I don’t want to lug them around. Besides, we never wear half the stuff we bring, and inevitably, I forget the things I need most. I will just keep reminding myself that there will be stores wherever I’m going, whether it’s Colorado, Florida, or Ecuador.

10. I will ... seek out undiscovered paths and encourage my children to celebrate the unexpected and unfamiliar rather than be afraid. Such experiences help give us confidence whenever unexpected obstacles are thrown in our paths.

May you have many happy adventures taking the kids in 2007.

© 2006 EILEEN OGINTZ, DISTRIBUTED BY TRIBUNE MEDIA SERVICES, INC.

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